Tag Archives: humor

The New Acropolis Museum (?)

The following is a totally made up story about a very real piece of architecture and the Acropolis in Athens, Greece. It is, in the loosest sense of the term, based on historical events.

One day long time ago, some people built the Acropolis on top of a very prominent hill. It was visible from all over the city, and those responsible for its placement patted themselves on the back and said “Oh hell yeah. People are gonna love this thing forever. Its gonna be a crumbling mess and people will still come from all around the world to see it.”

And they were right. 

Fast forward… I dunno… like 100 years? Probably more like 1,000. Lets say fast forward 100-1000 or maybe more years later and some civilization is in power and at war and they store gun powder in the Parthenon. The thing gets hit by a cannonball and BLAM. 

Fast forward again, and people start to take an interest in historic preservation and restoration. They look at this thing and they say, “You know what would fix this? Lets put in a bunch of rebar to hold it together and lets recreate and rebuild everything man, time, and pollution has destroyed.” They had really great intentions, but they totally botch the project and the whole site is worse off than it started. Rebar is rusting, the added portions look totally terrible, and things basically are not going well.

Okay, now in 1975 people say, “Whoa. You guys. Listen. We gotta do something here because this is really historically significant and we want it to last forever for posterity. What can we do to save the Acropolis and the Parthenon?”  They think about it for  like 20 minutes straight and say, “We gotta build another acropolis with all our modern technology and slowly move everything into the new acropolis we built to save them forever. But one question: Who will design this new museum?”

As they finish saying that, Bernard Tschumi flies in on a hot air balloon and is hired on the spot.

(You can read an abbreviated version of what actually happened by clicking here. It is actually rather interesting.)

newacropolismuseum_exterior_03

So my version of the story may have taken some artistic license, but the basic plot is spot on. This is the New Acropolis Museum by Bernard Tschumi in Athens, Greece.

newacropolismuseum_exterior_02

newacropolismuseum_facade_02

newacropolismuseum_facade_01

newacropolismuseum_exterior_04

This building is massive. And please forgive me, it has been so long since I visited, I know the building is actually sited ON TOP of some other ruins but I can’t recall what they are…

newacropolismuseum_entry_01

The entry to the museum is under a giant flying canopy.

newacropolismuseum_entry_03

Under the canopy are some exposed ruins, this makes the museum experience begin even before you enter. I think the floor is also glass and allows you to see the other ruins sheltered by the footprint of the museum.

newacropolismuseum_entry_02

Eventually as you explore the museum, you find that the giant canopy above the entry is a roof terrace to the museum’s cafe.

newacropolismuseum_cafe_01

You may have caught glimpses of the glass box on the top of the museum in other photos. This is where my make-believe story gets real. This glass box is oriented the exact same way as the Parthenon is on the Acropolis. This glass box is the new Parthenon resting above a man made hill of Acropolis artifacts. Look at the reflection of the Parthenon in the photo above. Bernard Tschumi wins points for that regardless of this strange strategy for historic preservation.

newacropolismuseum_giftshop_01

Inside you find all of the standard museum programmatic components. Notice the scattered lights in the museum gift shop. I decided they were mimicking stars in the night sky.

Either that or someone had a field day in Revit placing lights everywhere.

newacropolismuseum_gallery_08

The museum is clean and beautiful. There are many pushy security guards that won’t allow you to take photos.

newacropolismuseum_gallery_03

newacropolismuseum_gallery_06

Much of the museum is as beautiful as you’d expect. But the central area is a type of atrium where many floors at different levels all cross and open up. The building really has a spectacular sectional quality.

newacropolismuseum_gallery_02

newacropolismuseum_gallery_05

newacropolismuseum_gallery_07

The coolest (and most creepy) part of the museum is glass floors. It is something that is used in multiple areas and can be unsettling. People who are scared of heights may find certain spaces challenging.

As well as anyone wearing a skirt or dress…

newacropolismuseum_gallery_04

Once you reach the top floor you are in the New Parthenon. Metallic columns match the locations of the original Parthenon and the friezes that are slowly being removed from the Parthenon are being relocated to here.

newacropolismuseum_gallery_01

It is a cool idea, but I am amazed at this historic preservation solution. I can see that the decorative sculpture is being saved, but how is this preserving the architecture? 

newacropolismuseum_exteriornight_01

Regardless of your opinion of the preservation strategy, the building is cool. Definitely one of the more interesting pieces of architecture we saw, and perhaps one of the more contemporary in terms of style and aesthetic.

If you go to Athens, you can’t miss it. It is literally gigantic. Even if you tried, you probably still couldn’t miss it. 

Advertisements
Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

24-hour Clock for the Unemployed

Are you unemployed? Unsure of what to do with all of your free-time? This is the solution for you:

unemployed watch

Finally, a device that brilliantly divides your day on an hourly basis. No more wondering when you should eat pizza. No more worrying whether you’ve watched enough television. All of your daily activities are scheduled cleanly and simply to ensure you make the most out of every unemployed day!

And now, introducing the unemployed wall clock! Specially crafted for those who are dedicated to the unemployed lifestyle!

unemployed wall clock

The new unemployed wall clock is easily customizable to your taste in time mis-management:

Let’s say you REALLY enjoy taking baths and need to incorporate that into your “busy” schedule. Well, you can easily block off several hours for bathing! Or perhaps you don’t particularly enjoy video games and cannot sleep at night without getting drunk. Simply replace all video game icons with tiny beer mugs and you’re off to a shitfaced good time!

Be sure to ask your loved ones for an unemployed watch or wall clock this year so you can always be “too busy” to see them ever again!

Design Work just thinking

Tagged , , , , , , , , , ,

I Hate Flying.

The title says it all. So while I was waiting for a connecting flight, I made some doodles and wrote a list. Here it is:

1. I hate people who gather around the entrance of the plane to board, when it isn’t even close to their turn.

2. I hate waiting.

3. I hate turbulence.

4. I hate people who bring deli meats and cheeses to make sandwiches on the plane.

5. I hate people who think its okay to laugh out loud at the book they are reading.


6. I hate people who order tomato juice.

7. I hate people who insist on sharing their life stories.

8. I hate people who think the rules don’t apply to them.

8. I hate pretty flight attendants.

9. I hate when people turn the lights on.

10. I hate when people close their windows.

11. I hate landing.

12. I hate that everyone seems so comfortable when I can hardly breath, let alone move.

This list portrays me as an angry person. I can assure you, that is not the case. There are a few things I do enjoy about flying:

1. I love seeing tiny cars zip around.

2. I love looking at patterned fields of crops from high above.

3. I love going to new and fantastic places.

4. I love flying over, near, and through clouds.

See, I’m not completely full of hate. Just mostly…

Also, Happy Thanksgiving!

just thinking

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,